Phantom
by Yusagi
Summary: Hope. Simultaniously Humanity's greatest strength and greatest weakness. He might have said it was impossible, but he had also taught Rose not to believe in that word. Not even if it destroyed her. Post Doomsday. DR
1. Anniversary

Disclaimer: I don't own DW. I don't even slightly maybe partially have bragging rights to it like Sci Fi. I wouldn't be all evil and show AoG/DD back-to-back.

AN: This isn't actually a new idea of mine. It's an older idea I had that I could never flesh out very well, adapted for the purposes of DW. Got the idea randomly yesterday, and dunno how long it will end up--I'd guess only about 5 chapters.

One a side note--as its implied in DD, she does at least remember a small amount of her time as the Time Goddess/Bad Wolf/Vortex Lady

* * *

_Phantom_

**Chapter 1:_ Anniversary_**

_  
The unshed tears, unspoken plaintives, were so thick in the air that the image of her Doctor nearly shimmered with it. She could hardly breathe with the effort of appearing strong and brave for him, the determination not to weep and beg for him to come back somehow. _

"Am I ever going to see you again?"

He shook his head sadly, eyes shining with a sadness so deep she wanted nothing more than to reach out and hold him close, to take his hand and promise everything would be okay again, like she had so many times before in his last life.

But...it wouldn't be. Not this time. Not ever again.

"You can't."

One year. The time had slipped through her fingers like water--she who once had the whole of time coursing through her veins, ready to bend to her every whim. But that was so long ago...that was while she was still alive, before she had been banished to far worse than simply the 'slow path'.

She sighed softly and brushed a stray lock of hair out of her face as she looked down at the consol. Tomorrow was the anniversary, and it was driving her to distraction--the wistful, bad poetry kind of distraction. It probably wasn't healthy for her 'recovery', either, as her mother referred to her greiving.

She had watched everything..._everything_, but even with the aid of all of Torchwood's resources, she had not found even a faintly glimmering hope of seeing him again. Not like she really should have thought she could outsmart him...but maybe if they were working together from either side, they could find another way. There had to be a way. Impossible wasn't a word she was very familiar with anymore.

"Miss Tyler?" The voice of her aide broke through her musings rather abruptly, and she looked up from the monotonous readings of the rift's energy with an expression of surprise. The short, wiry man frowned, green eyes showing concern, as he leaned into the doorway. "We're shutting down, you know. The night shift is coming in."

"Oh, I'll stay a bit longer."

"With respect, don't you have a family meeting tonight?"

Oh yes. That. Her mother had set up a holiday to cover up what had happened, and pretend this world was something to celebrate. She frowned. Perhaps she was being too harsh on her mother...Jackie really was only trying to help.

She glanced at her watch. 10 o'clock. If she left now, she would make it in time to avoid any understanding lectures. If she were lucky, they would let her spend this evening reflecting on what she chose to, if she just made the toast.

But, she had to be here for Midnight. She had to be. Because it had been a year, and things like a universal resealing had to ripple. She'd missed the anniversary of her arrival, but she wouldn't miss this one. Because if she gave up now, it would mean finally giving in to the fact that she would really never see him again. And she would never do that. Never.

"Don't worry, I won't miss it." She said reassuringly.

The man looked unconvinced, but nodded. Before vanishing into the hallway again, he paused to say one more thing. "I hope you find whatever it is."

She nodded softly, and turned back to the readings. She didn't know what she would do when she actually saw the fluctuation, but she would know then.

--

Jackie Tyler frowned slightly as she looked over the party goers. Pete was entertaining the guests with his usual flair--being very accustomed to such parties from his original Jackie. Jake was trying his hardest to compete with Mickey for the attentions of a lovely young redhead.

Rose was nowhere to be found.

"Do ya think she was hung up with Torchwood work?" Mickey asked with a forced nonchalance, as he walked up to her.

"Maybe."

"Nothin we can do, then." He frowned. "Even Pete don't get into Torchwood without a guest pass."

"I know."

The dark skinned man glanced at a nearby clock wordlessly. Jackie didn't need to follow his gaze...she had looked five minutes ago. 1:30...the party was already starting to wind down, and Rose had not shown yet.

"She'll be okay." He said it with a confidence she almost envied.

She smiled softly as she turned toward him, unshed tears in her eyes. "No she won't, Mickey. She'll never be okay."

--

Torchwood was strangely peaceful at night, as it worked with a skeleton crew--most of them in the deeper levels, far away from his security clearance. He could whistle and hum and dance to whatever silent musical jam was echoing through his mind. Although...his boss often joked that if he ever sang along to it, his voice would set of the Alien Intruder alarms.

The lights in the corridors were at half-power, giving the white walls a blueish sheen, and most of the rooms were dark save for the occassional flashing monitor--whose readouts were probably being directed toward monitors deeper in anyway.

The odd camera decorated the halls as if in a reminder not to run about naked or take random lab samples from trays, but he had no doubt the visible ones weren't the only eyes watching his movements through the building--this whole place was far too much futuristic sci-fi for him.

His humming died in his throat as he heard an odd sort shuffling noise coming from the room ahead of him. His hands gripped the waste cart in front of him tightly as he slowly wheeled it forward, a sort of terrified curiousity pushing him relentlessly onward, though he would have liked to run in the opposite direction.

The doorway seemed to pivot itself to reveal more of the room with his every step--in that ponderous way only horror movies or old B-sci fis ever seemed to acheive. The lights were dimmed to almost dark, and a few screens blipped on and off along the walls. The room was almost exactly like any other room, with one exception.

Standing in the middle of the room, dark eyes on the strange monitor before her, pale skin mottled in the constantly shifting light of the bizzare readings of the machine, stood a woman so still he might have thought she were a statue, if not for the excess of tears streaming down her cheeks.

* * *

AN: Well...how do ya think of it? I'd like to say such like Rose gets better in later chapters, but don't wanna spoil it just yet. 


	2. Lull

Disclaimer: Oh boy...I want DW for christmas. Don't have it yet.

AN: Well, bit of a quick update, but as this story is pretty much written out already in my head, I figure I should get it done while its still there. :P

* * *

_Phantom_

**Chapter 2:_ Lull_**

Her hand fell to her side, arm arching with the need to reach out and touch him, to hold him close again and reassure herself that there was good in this universe. Even...even just for a proper goodbye. You couldn't say a proper goodbye without a hug, could you?

The sadness in his eyes reflected her thoughts.

"Why...Why didn't you come here and say it properly?" She managed through the thick lump in her throat. Of course, she already knew the answer, in a way. If he could have...then it wouldn't have been a goodbye, would it? Because he'd have taken her back, or stayed...

"The whole thing would fracture..." He shook his head slightly. "Two universes would collapse."

She spoke instinctively, the first word that came to mind. So simple, so obvious, and so painful.

A member of the clean up crew had found her. Apparently she hadn't noticed the time--or the lights going off around her. Jackie fully planned to give her an earful when she saw her--working herself to death was not readjusting herself to a new world...it was slow suicide. Yes, she planned on a good tongue-lashing the moment she got in earshot, and maybe a good slap, too.

Her plans derailed horrendously the moment she laid eyes on her daughter. Dried tracks of mascara were smudged across pale skin, and rich brown eyes--eyes that had always held such determination and defiance--seemed dull and hollow in their puffy red rims.

She looked so vulnerable and weak as she stared into the distance, that it was all Jackie could to not to pull her into her lap and rock her till she slept, like she had when Rose was a baby.

"Rose...sweetheart, what's wrong?" She shooed away the man that had escorted her daughter with a wave, and then pulled close the young woman whom, for once, looked as young as her age.

She didn't really need to ask that question. There was only once before that she had seen her oldest daughter like this was when they had first arrived here, before she had those dreams, and said her final goodbyes. She had never really gotten over it, but she had always hidden it behind a smile, buried it in the endless work that Torchwood offered.

Her daughter looked up at her with a sadness that shattered her heart. "Nothing, Mum. It was nothing."

She frowned severely, a moment, then rubbed Rose's arm soothingly. "It was something about the Doctor, wasn't it? What was it, Rose? You can tell me."

"I..." She chewed her bottom lip a moment. "I waited for Midnight...and nothing. Nothing happened."

Jackie squeezed her eyes shut, and pulled her daughter closer, willing away all the tears and pain that someone so young should never have to endure. "Oh, Rose..."

--

She pulled up the blanket tight to her chin with a sigh. The coarse blue wool of the underblanket and the heaviness of the flower-patterned comforter were like a reassuring sheild, a wall of warmth away from the cold, empty reality surrounding her.

She knew she shouldn't have expected anything. Those sort of 'midnight' things never actually worked like that. Those were fairy tales, not real life--not this one _or_ the one the Doctor had shown her. He had told her it was impossible...and he had never really been wrong before.

He really wasn't coming.

She snapped her eyes shut and curled tighter into a ball with a soft whimper. A part of her told her she was better than this, that she should be strong and brave, that she should make her life everything he would have wanted...but a stronger part said he would have wanted her to be with _him_.

"Doctor..."

--

Mickey barely scrounged up a wave to his friend, Jake, as the man made his way home with his newest catch--Mickey'd been much too worried about Rose to compete with Jake like he normally did.

Everything would be alright. Rose simply needed some time alone, and she'd be fine. There was nothing to worry about. Jackie had told him no end of reasurrances and insisted he go home and rest...

But he was not the only one stubbornly staying in the pensive silence of the Tyler sitting room, too worried to sleep. On the opposite couch from Mickey, Pete Tyler slung one arm over his wife's shoulders in casual reassurance, while she cradled her sleeping infant daughter. The crackling of the dying fireplace was the only sound that filled the room.

Mickey shifted uncomfortably, and glanced toward the stairway that led to Rose's room, from which not a sound came.

"She'll be okay..." Jackie said softly, more to herself than to anyone in the room, voice as strained as if she had been the one crying all night. "She's strong, Rose. She'll be okay."

"Was it just the anniversary that caused this?" Pete asked, not for the first time.

"I...I don't know." Jackie sighed hopelessly. "She went on about rifts and readings and...oh, you know me. I couldn't make heads or tails of it all."

A rift...like the one that they often charged up at?

"The Cardiff Rift?"

"I think so." Jackie nodded. "Why?"

"Nothin..." Mickey frowned. "Its just a place she and the Doctor would go. Maybe somethin happened to it."

She shook her head. "She said nothing happened. For the longest time, thats all she said."

Mickey sighed after a moment, settling his face in his hands. He hated feeling so helpless, so utterly worthless. He had originally joined up with Rose and the Doctor thinking it would make him feel like he was important and a part of something big--and found his place wasn't anywhere in his home universe at all. Ever since he'd come to this new world, he'd been someone who influenced everything he came into contact with, a savior and a troublemaker at the same time...

Now...now he just felt like Mickey Smith, ex-boyfriend of a girl who went swanning off with someone more important, the tin dog that got left at home until they wanted him to hack a government agency. Worst, he suddenly felt as if he no longer knew Rose at all.

--

The sun was just beginning to color the skies when she finally fell into the comforting arms of sleep. She dreamt of warm, familiar arms holding her tight. Of a soothing voice telling her everything would be alright, telling her all of her faith was well-founded after all.

She wanted to cry when she looked up at the one holding her tight, in the familiar, beautiful, lighting of the TARDIS consol room, but there was something so calming, so wonderful, so reassuring about his presence, all she could do was cling tightly to him, and breathe in his familiar scent. The scent of home.

She was complete, she was happy, she never wanted to leave his arms, not ever again.

There was a loud crash, and the wonderful scene vaporized into her empty bedroom, chill with the morning. A shrill voice came from outside the room. "What the _hell_ are you doing?! You're gonna kill someone with that! And this early in the morning, too!"

There was a reply from a male voice, closer, but Rose did not care to hear it. It had all been a dream. Of course it had been. And just like a year before, she had been ruthlessly ripped away from it all too soon.

She sat up in the bed, and brought her knees to her chin, fighting away the urge to break down into tears. She would not cry this time. Not any more...all it did was worry others...she could handle this on her own. She could...she would. She bit her lip and buried her face in her knees.

A moment later, however, her face jerked upward once again, as she heard a familiar whisper echo through the room.

_"Rose...?"_

* * *

AN: Whew, this chapter was a bit tough, considering I only really had material for a few paragraphs for this chapter in my mind. 


	3. Vision

Disclaimers: IdonotownDWIdonotownDWIdonotownDW.

AN: 3 chapters in rapid succession! Only other time I've done this was my AU FF7 short story that was 5 chaps long, too.

* * *

_Phantom_

**Chapter 3:_ Vision_**

Her breath was choking up more with every pointless exchange of words, every vain attempt to fill the endless space between them, to touch the other with anything at all.

"What're ya gonna do?" Her voice was little more than a whisper, and her eyes burned with so many tears that demanded release. He frowned a moment as if considering, before shrugging and smiling with a forced cheerfulness anyone could have seen through.

"I've got the TARDIS...same old life, I suppose, last of the Time Lords."

She frowned softly, uncaring of the wind that blew her hair wildly into her face. It hurt...it hurt so much to stand there, inches away from him, a universe apart. Where was forever? Where were the fairytales of happiness, and of true love always working out, that her mother always used to tell her?

His smile had vanished almost as quickly as it had come, replaced with that same sadness, that pensiveness she couldn't place. She knew now all too well what it felt like to be standing on either side of a glass wall...except this one was so impossibly thin, and so completely permanent.

"All on your own?" She managed through the choking tears, failing miserably at her attempt at curiousity.

He was so sad...so alone...she would have given anything at all if it meant she could be able to hold him one more time.

"Mickey, you'll wake the _dead_ with that!" Jackie sighed from the base of the stares, frowning at the family friend, who was wrestling with a rather ugly statuette--which she'd been meaning to throw out forever. "Just let the _servants get it!_"

"No way! I gotta pay my way for stayin' the night!" Mickey countered, maneuvering it down another step with a resounding thump.

"Ooohh, you're going to ruin the _marble_!" She insisted. "You don't need to _pay_ for spending the night, Mickey! Why the amount of things you've done for me--"

"I'm not a freeloader!" Mickey snapped, glaring up at her. "Now, you said you wanted this outta here, so I'm gonna _do it_!"

Jackie might have continued arguing, but their scene was interrupted by a sudden yell from Rose's bedroom.

--

Her head moved so quickly upward, the room spun cartwheels in front of her a moment, and she wondered if she might have given herself whiplash. Even before the room quite returned to focus, however, she saw him. And it absolutely was not her fault she gave an undignified yelp at seeing him.

He had that strange, half-sad smile on his face that she remembered from the year before...and he stood not unlike how he had appeared before, as well. His brows knitted in understanding and sympathy, and he reached a hand out toward her.

_"Rose..."_ His voice was distant, faint, and yet it seemed to come from everywhere at once.

It was enough to drive a woman to incoherent sobs, if she wasn't careful.

"Is it...?" She swallowed softly, voice barely audible even in the silence of the room.

His smile softened, and he nodded, stepping closer to the bed, and running the back of his knuckles along her cheek. His hand left a trail of tingly warmth that seemed to spread throughout her body in goosebumps...so familiar, so real.

_"I missed you, Rose."_

She sniffled back tears. "I missed you, too."

There was that same sadness in his eyes again, speaking of unshed tears, and of tears long ago lost. _"I'm sorry I'm late."_

She forced a smile, fighting down the urge to lunge forward and pull him close for a long-overdue hug. "You're a Time Lord. You're never late."

He chuckled softly. _"I know a few people who'd disagree."_

"Are you really here this time? Can I touch you now?"

His mouth opened to speak the moment the door did, causing her to jump and turn toward the two forms that now blocked the doorway.

"Rose?!" Mickey gasped. "Are you okay?!"

She laughed. Mickey was so one-track minded sometimes. Here the Doctor stood, quite obviously the reason for her yelp of surprise (she had gotten out of practice with his sudden appearances), and he had to ask what was wrong with her!

Jackie pushed by him to look through, and Mickey gave Rose a funny look, replying indignantly. "What's so funny? You just scream an scare us all, and you think that's funny?"

She blinked. "Mickey...the Doctor..."

She turned to point at him, in case Mickey had still missed him, but he was no where to be seen.

--

Mickey frowned as Rose looked around the room slowly, with wide and confused eyes. "What about the Doctor?"

"Did you dream about him, Love?" Jackie piped in, looking sympathetic.

Rose looked lost. "But...he...he was here."

"What, the Doctor?" Mickey asked, taken aback, and couldn't resist a quick once over the small room with his eyes, as well.

"He was here..." She said softly. "I saw him...I heard him...I _felt_ him!"

Jackie glanced over at him worriedly, as if to ask 'is it possible?'

"Where'd he go, then, Rose?" Mickey sighed softly. He knew from personal experience the man could be damn elusive when he wanted to be, but this had to be a stretch even for him. Besides, why would he _want_ to hide from them?

Rose opened her mouth a moment, then frowned.

"Sweetheart, it was a dream." Jackie said softly, stepping toward her.

"N-_No!_" She snapped. "I was awake...I..."

She trailed off, and hugged her knees, eyes glistening with unshed tears.

--

She sighed softly as the door closed behind her friend and mother. It had been a little while until they decided she wasn't listening to them, and then a bit longer before they decided it was okay to leave her in the room.

But what a lovely, real, heartbreaking dream it had been.

_"Oh...how long was I gone?"_

She had half a mind to give another yelp, but as the last time she had, he vanished, she settled for a small jump and a wide-eyed stare. He looked genuinely apologetic.

"Where did you _go_, you...you.."

_"Rose, this is important, so listen to me."_ Hands encircled her shoulders, and his dark eyes pinned her in place with an intense stare. _"Rose...I'm not here. Not in the conventional sense."_

"But...you can't be just a projection...you can touch me!"

He frowned. _"Something went wrong, I don't know what. There was a gap for an infintismal nanosecond, one I could slip through without rippling, and in so doing, close it."_

"What happened? Where are you?"

_"Between Universes."_

She swallowed a dry lump in her throat. "But...between universes..."

_"Is the Void, yes."_ He nodded, looking a bit impatient._ "I thought that's where I would end up, too. In fact, its possible I am...the TARDIS isn't responding to anything I tell it to do."_

"I don't understand..." She frowned.

_"Rose...to put it in simple words...as far as either universe is concerned, I only exist in your mind."_

* * *

AN: Might turn out more like 8 chapters, as its a bit slower pace than I expected, but not sure yet. 


	4. Routene

Disclaimer: If I owned DW, I'd be spoiling a perfectly good plot.

AN: Skipped a couple days, since I was dead exhausted from working all day, and then had a rather long haircut.

* * *

_Phantom_

**Chapter 4: _Routene_**

"You're dead, officially, back home." He changed the subject abruptly, glancing who-knew where. "So many people died that day, and you've gone missing...you're on the list of the dead."

Tears fought once again to overwhelm her, as she brought up a hand to fight for a semblance of composure. Dead in one universe, never born in another...belonging no where. No where but with him...and he was so impossibly far from reach now.

"Yet..." He seemed about to laugh, though no true mirth, or even genuine happiness, shone in his eyes. "Here you are, living a life, day to day."

His false cheer melted once again to a somber, sad, frown, as he looked down at her. "The one adventure I can never have."

And she would have given it all away for a few minutes more with her beloved Doctor. Really with him. Held close and warm in his arms, believing blissfully that nothing could ever go wrong, that they would always be together.

How she hated the naivity of her old self. Of the Rose Tyler that had two years of truly living, and threw it all away in the silly notion that she had so many more to waste.

She frowned in confusion. "I...I don't understand. How? How is that possible?"

He shook his head. _"There is some sort of residual telepathic connection between...between you and the TARDIS. I'm stuck close enough to the barrier that the TARDIS can use you as a sort of beacon or buoy, to keep us anchored partially in this universe. That's probably what's protecting the TARDIS and me from most of the effects of the Void--but even she can't keep this up forever."_

Horror crept progressively through her body as she listened to his explaination, and by the time he had finished, her hands gripped the sheets tightly, and her eyes were wide with fear. "What...what are you gonna do?"

_"I can't do much more than I already am, Rose."_ He sighed. _"The TARDIS is directing too much energy to simply staying anchored to do anything else, and I can't influence anything in this universe but you."_

She swallowed softly, falling back into the old familiar mindset she once had, when she used to travel with the Doctor, and they worked out situations like this on a daily basis. "What can I do?"

_"I'm not sure yet."_ He frowned. _"But chances are, if there's anything to be done, it'll be at the rift."_

She nodded, and swung her feet out of the bed, silky pink chamoise riding up to her thighs. The Doctor quickly averted his gaze to the ceiling, trying to appear nonchalant.

_"That one's new."_

She smirked. "You kept track of my night-wear?"

He looked uncomfortable. _"Well...I mean, obviously it is. You didn't exactly pack up your things after all."_

She grinned. "Yeah...Dad--well, Pete--gave it to me."

_"So you're gettin on well with him, then?"_

She nodded. "Yeah. I mean, it was a bit awkward at first, but he really loves Mum, and I guess I won some respect...I mean, I don't know if he'll ever look at me like his own child and not one he adopted, but I know he loves me in his own way."

He smiled. _"That's good. Still working at Torchwood?"_

She nodded, then winced when she remembered the incident from the night before. "I better get back there before they write me off as too sick for duty."

--

Mickey's attention was diverted from Jackie's incessant badgering about the ugly statue when the door to Rose's room opened, to reveal a fully dressed-for-work Rose.

"Oh, no you don't!" Jackie snapped, whose attention had obviously also been diverted. "You're not goin off to Torchwood and spendin' all day and then some again!"

"Mum, its my _job_!" She sighed, crossing her arms.

"You don't treat it as a job!" Jackie insisted. "You're just trying to make the days go faster until you die!"

She shifted uncomfortably. "Mum..."

"I _know_ its hard, love." Jackie continued, ignoring the fact that her daughter had spoken at all. "But you have to _live_! You don't think he'd want you to die, do you?"

"I _was_, Mum." She said tersely, hands clenched at her sides. "I was livin the only way I could! But that doesn't matter now."

"Why not?" Mickey finally chipped in, frowning. "You're jus' givin up now?"

"No." She said cooly, narrowing her eyes at him. "It doesn't matter now, because he's back."

--

Rose sighed and gave her best 'this is all YOUR fault' look to the Doctor, who in turn gave her his best 'innocent lamb' look. He was better than she was.

The 'family', which was Mickey, Pete, and Jackie, were all gathered on the opposite couch from her, frowning in contemplation. They'd believed her last time when she'd had the dreams, and then they'd all seen the proof that she was right that time.

"But...didn't he say it was impossible ever to even see eachother?" Mickey frowned.

"He said that when you left, too." She replied curtly.

_"Not quite--"_

"Don't even start." She snapped, glowering at him, and making it clear it was still all his fault she was being looked at like she was crazy by her own family.

Mickey arched an eyebrow at her comment, but it was Pete that spoke. "Then...what can Torchwood do?"

_"Probably nothing, on their own."_ The Doctor chimed in, even though he should have full-well known they wouldn't hear him. _"Luckily, they've got me and Rose to do it."_

She couldn't help but give him a grudging smile at the fact that he included her in the equation. In return, he winked at her. God, it was good to see him again without it being yet another heart wrenching goodbye.

"He says he can help them work to find a solution." She said simply.

_"I liked my version better."_ He pouted slightly.

"That doesn't explain yesterday." Jackie said in her usual straight-forward manner. "And it seems a bit quaint to me."

She gritted her teeth a moment, thankful her mother didn't go into details about that particular incident...she didn't need to hear a lecture from the Doctor, too. "I told you, it was a scientific project."

"No no...you were cryin your eyes out, sayin stuff about him not comin...and now suddenly he has?"

The Doctor flashed her a concerned look.

"I guess it was a miscalculation."

"'Miscalculation'..."

"Mum, he doesn't have much time." She sighed. "And I'm the only one who can help him."

---

News had spread rather quickly through the relevant branches of Torchwood. After all, who didn't want to hear about their resident alien specialist with a tendancy toward obsession, and a penchant for looking only slightly sane at times.

Those in the know said she'd been working long after hours, just staring. The room had been checked for even traces of anything that could have provoked such a strangely shell-shocked reaction, but there was nothing.

Reportedly she even _said_ it was nothing. In fact, that was all she _would_ say when that janitor had found her. It might have been a bit worrisome were it anyone else. But when Rose Tyler had a wig-out, it was simply amazing she hadn't before.

Nevertheless, it was a surprise to most of the employees working on the Rift-Monitoring when she marched into the room hte next day, as if nothing had happened. Much to many of their's chagrin, she came bearing a new assignment.

"All of you, perform every scan we have on that rift." She said crisply, folding her hands behind her back. "Report to me anything that even _seems_ out of the ordinary. _Anything._"

* * *

AN: Alrighty. Possibly 3 or 4 more chapters to go, then. 


	5. Zero Hour

Disclaimer: I'd be in trouble for ruining plots if I owned DW.

AN: Huzzah! The plots finally starting to get rolling!

* * *

_Phantom_

**Chapter 5: _Zero Hour_**

"There's still a Torchwood open for business..." She tried to smile, but it did not come out right at all through her cracking voice and building tears. "I think I know a thing or two about aliens."

Such pride glowed in his eyes, such a willful projection of happiness. How he wanted her to be happy...she knew it. But how could she be happy when she knew he had no one left to hold his hand, no one more to look to. No one to save him from himself.

"Rose Tyler. Defender of the Earth!"

Not the galaxy, not the universe, not time, not anything anymore but a little ball of mud spinning in a galaxy she didn't even know, populated with people who never even wanted to have the slightest clue that there was something out there beyond what their mundane and limited lives gave them.

And oh, how she hated it.

She frowned at the screen. "What exactly am I supposed to be looking for, Doctor?"

_"Ahh...well..."_ He frowned a minute. _"Fluctuations. Of any kind, really."_

"I'm not seeing any, Doctor." She huffed, watching another loop of the same readings playing over and over again.

_"You're not looking hard enough."_ He insisted rather impatiently, then pointed at a spot near the bottom of the screen. _"There. See that spike? That's the TARDIS."_

"But that's--"

_"Rose, Torchwood has nice toys, but they're still just apes with sticks."_ He sighed. _"Its almost not acute enough to make out the signal, but there it is."_

Nodding a bit reluctantly, she pointed at the area he had pointed. "That's it."

The assistant scrunched up his face. "That's far within the 2.0 MWBs error range due to interference from devices set up around the rift."

She shook her head. "This equipment isn't good enough to accurately detect things halfway stuck in the Void. That's it."

The man gave a look that questioned what she could have been looking for, before shaking his head, and pointing at the part of the screen both she and the Doctor had earlier. "That's not even patterned or vaguely uniform! Its completely erratic. That's just the unstable nature of the rift itself."

_"So now apes are the masters of pattern recognition!"_ The Doctor remarked over her shoulder, voice thick with sarcasm.

She narrowed her eyes at the man. "I should know what the rift gives off. That's different."

"Its very _existance_ demands it to be!" The man threw his hands up in exasperation. "It'll be like that today, and gone tomorrow!"

"I don't believe I was looking for your opinion!" She snapped, hands in a white-knuckled grip around the laptop in front of her. "Get the sensors attuned to that signal!"

"You don't understand...if we turn them on that high, it'll be like turning up a headset mic and using it to record a conference!" The man said in an antagonized shout. "We'll pick up all sorts of loud and annoying snores, and almost none of the words the man is speaking!"

"Then I suggest you find a way to filter it better." She said cooly. "Because I need that signal stronger if I'm going to do anything."

"Anything about what?"

"Nothing _you_ have security clearence for." She retorted. "Now get back to work!"

The Doctor made an amused noise in his throat as the man finally sulked off. _"Rose Tyler...a regular slave driver, you are."_

She sniffed. "I'm tired of being treated like I'm crazy just because a certain Time Lord didn't get a move on fast enough."

He snorted. _"Now you're blaming me for a few nanoseconds?"_

"A TARDIS is only as good as her driver."

He rolled her eyes. _"Oh no, you did _not_ just try an turn my ship against me, too!"_

She smirked and stuck her tongue out at him. "Don't say ya don't deserve it."

--

Jake cut off in the middle of whatever it was he had been saying. "You're not listening to me, are you?"

"Don't be daft!" Mickey glared at his friend. "'Course I am!"

"Tell me one word--_One. Word._ of what I just said."

"Ah..." Mickey frowned a moment. What was a common word? "I."

"Liar."

"Oy! _Now_ who's lyin?!" Mickey snorted. "You don't go one sentence without sayin' that!"

Jake rolled his eyes. "If I was boring you, you could've _said_ so, instead of lettin' me waste my breath!"

"That's not it..." He sighed, guilty now for allowing his thoughts about Rose to distract him from his friend. She was _fine_. She had to be.

Jake looked across the table at him skeptically. "Then what's eatin' you?"

Mickey looked down at the empty plate of food in front of him a few moments. Jake was his best friend, they'd been through more crisises than most people would like to imagine. (Though, compared to people like Rose or the Doctor what he did was child's play) Maybe he could trust him with this? After all, even Jackie said he was almost family.

With a sigh, Mickey looked up and opened his mouth to tell his friend. Jake was quicker to speak, however, looking immensely pleased.

"What'd I tell ya? I can _too_ go a sentence without saying 'I'!"

--

The man sighed as he thumbed through the pages of the new 'readouts'. They were gibberish. Complete and utter gibberish. Not even _Plato_ could draw meaning out of it. Anything meaningful had been choked by the absurd abundance of interference that he had _told_ her would be there.

Still...when he handed the paper over--after she mumbled a few things under her breath, she seemed quite pleased. And he had seen her interacting with someone or something that simply wasn't there. No scan detected it. Nothing in the room could have even possibly have been used as a communication device. There was no rift-residue from something that might have come through.

There wasn't even an odd report anywhere in the city this whole week. Nothing. So...obviously...his boss had chosen today of all days to completely unwind. To go absolutely batshit. And to waste his entire day on some mindless drivel that might or might not have any meaning whatsoever.

Great. And he thought _Tuesday_ had been a bad day.

--

He frowned over her shoulder as she leafed through the pages.

"So I'm hoping you can make anything out of this?" She said dryly, looking over at him.

_"Of course I can!"_ He looked affronted.

"So what'm I supposed to do?"

_"Dunno."_

She rolled her eyes. "Brilliant."

_"I can say this, though, Arturo was right about it only holding up another day."_

"Arthur."

He grinned at her, before fiddling with his glasses and turning back to the sheets of paper in her hands. _"There's just not enough residual energy to keep the small crack in reality open any longer without forcing it--and doing alotta damage in the process."_

She frowned. "How'd it get there?"

_"Oh, you know...something to do with residue from the sealing last year. It was much bigger when I got stuck in it."_ He grinned at her. _"Don't worry, Rose. I'm not gonna do anything that would endanger the universe!"_

"What if it closes?"

He blew air through his lips in a huff. _"Oh, I supose the TARDIS would lose its anchor, and we'd both tumble into the void."_

Color drained from her face.

A firm, unnaturally hot hand squeezed her shoulder, and he pinned her with an intense stare. _"That won't happen, Rose."_

--

Jackie paced the considerable length of the living room, hefting her phone in one hand, trying to remember another person she could call to talk to insanity simply to get her mind off the fact that her daughter was running late again. She was off work at 7--it was already 9 o'clock, and not even a phone call.

"Jackie..." Her husband sighed softly, worry etched deep in his dark eyes as he looked up at her from the couch. "All that worrying isn't going to help you any..."

"Oh, Pete..." She threw herself onto the couch next to him, wringing the phone in her hands nervously. "I'm so worried..."

A strong arm encircled her shoulders, and pulled her close in a reassuring embrace. "It'll be okay, Jacks...our daughter is stronger than she looks. I know she'll pull through this."

She smiled gratefully up at him, but did not feel very reassured. "I...I just wish I could help her..."

--

Rose groaned as she thumped her head on her wooden desk, listening to the way its low thud reverberated through the now almost-empty Torchwood Tower. All day, and it seemed like they were no where closer to finding a way to pry open the rift just enough to let him through, without doing permanant damage, before midnight.

She glanced up at the clock, and felt her heart lurch. 11:50. "Oh, god..."

The Doctor looked up from the sheets of information she'd arrayed on a nearby table. (He couldn't touch anything but her on his own, so the only real way to combine their efforts was to set everything up so he could see it at once.) The frown of concentration he was wearing deepened to something very grave when he followed her gaze.

He gave a soft laugh. _"Looks like time's up."_

"No!" She snapped, glaring at him. She wouldn't give up. Not again. This wouldn't become just another sad goodbye...she refused to let time beat her again.

Perhaps her expression showed her sentiments--or perhaps he could read some of her thoughts being in her mind, but his frown softened to that same sad look he had so long ago.

She looked away from him deliberately. "We've still got 10 minutes. We can do this."

_"Even if we did, even if we found a way to do it in the next _instant_, it takes a half hour to get from here to the rift."_

"Not if its something we can do here!" She insisted furiously, still refusing to look up at him. Because if she saw him again like she had seen him in Norway, she would have to admit it really was over. That she would have to say goodbye again. Really say goodbye. That he was going to die, and she would have to watch.

Hot tears burned her cheeks as she flipped through pages, barely even able to read them before she discarded them as useless.

_"Rose!"_ A hand cupped her cheek and pulled her face toward his. His expression was completely unreadable to her, as he stared down at her face in silence a few moments. Maybe he was memorizing her face, wanting to think of her as his last thoughts. Maybe he couldn't read her mind, and was trying.

"Doctor..." He voice was as choked as it had been once, so long ago.

_"I lost you twice, Rose."_ He said softly. _"I thought both times I was never going to see you, and yet...here you are."_ There was that strange mix of happiness and sadness in the smile that appeared on his face.

"I don't want to lose you again..." She whispered, not bothering to hide the tears this time.

_"Even legends come to an end, Rose."_ He ran a thumb across her cheek lightly, to smear away a tear. _"I'm thankful more than anything, that I get a chance to say goodbye again. Properly this time. Not alot of people get that chance."_

She gave a small laugh, but it sounded more like a sob than anything else. Here he was. It was everything she had asked for that day in Norway. She could hold him, he could hold her. She got one more chance to say goodbye. And all she could think about was how she wanted just a little longer.

_"I guess it really is my last chance this time."_ He grinned. _"I've never heard of Third Chances, have you?"_

She shook her head. "But...you'll..."

His hand moved to cover her mouth, and he shook his head. _"Don't. I knew it could come to this when I decided to try."_

She sniffled back further tears, and chewed her bottom lip as she looked up into his dark eyes, so full of sadness, of intensity, of hope, of love. Why did your nose always run when you cried? It was horribly unladylike.

His hand moved to the side of her face again, and the other came up to capture her in his grip, as if she might actually try and break his impossible gaze. _"I'm going to do it properly this time, Rose. And you of all people should know...nothing in this universe or any other is going to keep me from saying what I damn well want to say."_

* * *

AN: I love Jake. No malice was meant with my poking at him. And yes...MUCH longer chapter this time, to keep up with my schedule. 

And before you shoot me, I should tell you...I have a force-sheild, and I am not afraid to use it.

Link


	6. Confession

Disclaimer: Oh no no no. If I owned DW, I would do anything I could to keep 11 from coming for a looong time.

AN: Shifted to a longer chapter format to fit in everything I want into the size I want. Did I post two chapters in like a half hour or so? Lies.

* * *

_Phantom_

**Chapter 6: _Confession_**

She couldn't stand to hold it in any longer. She couldn't breathe at the thought, the minute chance, that he somehow might not know. That she could go on the rest of her life without him, and never have told him. She didn't think she would be able to survive if she did.

And of course...he wouldn't return the sentiment. How could he? It simply wasn't his way. He would go on. He would forget her. He had to. She didn't know if she should laugh or cry, but at the moment she was more inclined toward the latter.

"I suppose..." He said softly, grief and tears thickening his voice, as he fought to smile, and succeeded only in tearing her heart to smaller pieces. "...If its my last chance to say it..."

A lump caught in her throat that had nothing to do with her tears. She shouldn't hear it. She shouldn't want to. It wouldn't help when he was gone, it would only hurt more. She knew. She did...really. She would never see him again...

Her heart beat sped up considerably as he settled his gaze on her, love and sadness shining so plainly it was almost blinding. "Rose Tyler..."

...And then her heart was ripped mercilessly away and crushed under fate's heel with a cruel laugh. And it was all she could do to stand. To tell herself she still had to breathe. To tell herself life was worth living still.

To promise herself he would one day finish his sentence.

_"I'm going to do it properly this time, Rose. And you of all people should know...nothing in this universe or any other is going to keep me from saying what I damn well want to say."_

She attempted to swallow, but found her throat suddenly dry, as she stared up at his dark brown eyes. It was finally happening, the final bit of what she had promised herself--when she was too afraid to promise herself to be happy with him again. She didn't know whether to stall him or hurry him up. She didn't know if she would survive another cut-off.

The intensity of his expression clearly said he could not.

_"Rose Tyler...my wonderful, brilliant, Rose Tyler."_ He smiled softly, eyes sparkling with unshed tears. _"Rose Tyler...I..."_ He sighed softly in irritation. _"Oh, sod it all. I _love you_, Rose. I love you more than any Time Lord ought to love a human. More than he ought to love anything. More than anything's allowed to love anything, really."_

He laughed softly. _"I think thats what the multiverse is trying to say to us."_

Any semblance of control over her tears vanished right then and there. It was pathetic, but it didn't matter anymore. Here was everything she ever wanted, everything she had ever dared to hope when she was feeling the most brave, and she was going to lose it all in less than five minutes. And all she had to blame was the universe.

It wasn't bloody _fair!_

Her Doctor was holding her as tightly as he could manage--although he could 'touch' her, he wasn't _really_ there, so if he pushed too hard, he would just slip right through her--and murmuring soft nothings into her hair, offering meager comfort that could never truly soothe her.

"I love you..." She managed through her incessant wrenching sobs. "I love you so...so...I don't wanna lose you again!"

He pulled her chin up to his face gently once more. A tear had managed to escape him, and offend his cheek. She had never seen him cry before. Not really. It was somewhat shocking, somehow beautiful, and soul-shatteringly tragic. If she weren't already clinging to him--and if she wasn't worried she'd just go right through him again, like when she'd tripped on the desk getting up for coffee--she would have pulled him into a feirce hug to wipe it away.

_"Rose..."_

"Don't tell me to have a good life." She interrupted, biting her lower lip again. "Please...I...I just...not again."

He closed his eyes a moment, and shook his head, before smiling softly at her. _"All good things must come to an end, Rose."_

She hiccoughed.

_"And if I have to go out..."_ He grinned. _"I can't think of a better face or a better place than here with you."_

And that was when her heart froze in her chest, when all breath and all thought fled faster than a startled cheetah. That was when he dipped his head down just a fraction of an inch, and kissed her. It was a blazingly hot, beautiful, wonderful, heart shattering kiss.

And it was more than she could have ever dreamed in her wildest nights.

--

Mickey sighed softly as he handed Jackie Tyler a cup of tea, and fell back into a loveseat with an exhausted sigh. She was still gone. Not a word. Not a sign. Not a trace. And the damned Torchwood security refused to answer a _single_ question he or anyone else had asked! Not even her own mother, Jackie!

Said mother shook her head sadly, gazing into her cup of tea without actually drinking. "I shouldn't have let her go."

"You couldn't have stopped her." Mickey said, hoping to reassure her slightly.

His efforts were rewarded with a sharp glare. "I'm her mother!"

Jake was sitting on a nearby recliner, and shook his head. "Rose wouldn't be stopped by anyone. I don't know her as well as all you, but I know even from what I've seen, she won't be stopped from what she really wants to do."

"What if the Doctor is really trapped between worlds?" Pete supplied. "She's safe, I'm sure. She's strong, she's smart. She'll be fine."

Mickey nodded, shaking off the cold fear that tried to settle into him anew. "She'll be okay."

--

It seemed like forever. Warmth surged through her body, made her feel more alive than she ever had before--and she wasn't sure how much of that was the kiss, and how much of that was his hands running places no physical hand ought to be able to (And really, that was just cheating.).

In actuality it was probably about two minutes when they finally broke apart. Considering the fact that neither of them were physically there, they technically _could_ have stayed that way forever. But that would have meant the Doctor doing the same thing for an extended period of time. And that was something he simply did not do.

He chuckled almost awkwardly, grinning at her. _"I was going for the classic last kiss thing. Probably should have timed it a little better."_

"And leave without a proper goodbye?"

_"Well, I figured that was the best way to go out...but can't really do that now...the mood's gone kaput."_ His grin had almost no lingering sadness in it, and she found herself smiling back at him through the tears that still dampened her cheeks.

_"Guess I should just get to saying it, then."_ He said, smile dissolving into that all-too-familiar sadness.

"Don't want time getting in the way again..." She said softly, forcing her smile to stay in place.

_"No...certainly not that."_ He shook his head, hand caressing her cheek gently, and leaving a trail of fire in her skin. _"I guess...this really is the last time I'll see you."_

She fought back a sob and shook her head.

_"No, Rose, it is."_ He slid his hand back to run through her hair. _"It's been fantastic travelling with you, Rose. Really. I wouldn't trade it for anything. Nothing."_

"Wouldn't give it up for the world." She affirmed.

_"Or quite a bit more."_ He grinned. _"So...my beautiful, fantastic Rose..."_

And that was when her heart was mercilessly wrenched from her chest and deposited in her throat, as a precariously positioned stack of books left carelessly in their rushed researching fell uncerimoniously to the floor with a resounding crash.

With a scream, she whirled toward it, the Doctor's gaze following. There lie the books, with no one around to have pushed them. But what caught her gaze much more intently, was the clock that they had knocked off the table in their tumble.

It read, quite plainly. **12:05 am**

* * *

AN: GAH. Somehow it ended up another chapter longer than I hoped! STOP THAT! 


	7. Twilight

Disclaimer: Well...no. I don't own DW

AN: Ah, the chapter I've been waiting oh-so-long to write. And it's 7-of-9. How my inner-Trekkie squees!

* * *

_Phantom_

**Chapter 7 :_ Twilight_**

"It takes alot of power to send this projection, I'm in orbit around a super-nova..." He smiled softly, eyes devoid of any glimmer of happiness. "I'm blowing up a sun just to say goodbye."

She shook her head softly, it was almost hard to focus on him, the way he was translucent. "You look like a ghost."

He frowned and fiddled with his screwdriver. "Hold on..." Like always, it seemed to work magic, this time 'solidifying' his image.

She walked slowly toward his expectant form, still half un-believing that he was really there. That she had another chance to see him. She wanted to reach out and touch him to make sure. She didn't need to ask, of course. The TARDIS couldn't just push him through. He'd said he'd come for goodbye. So he couldn't be here, or he'd have stayed. But she asked anyway.

The sadness in his eyes told her he was not lying.

She blinked once, twice. But the clock still said it was past-midnight. That was when the Doctor suddenly burst into laughter.

_"Oh...Oh my..."_ He seemed to have found something absolutely hilarious, but she couldn't see what was so funny at all. _"I've been in your head too long! I'm going daft."_

"Hey!"

He shook his head, and waved a hand at her to ward off any attack. _"The rift didn't open midnight. It opened 3 o'clock in the morning. We have three more hours!"_

Then...all of that...all of the tears...

"You..._you_..."

He backed up further, expression serious and apologetic. _"I'm sorry, Rose! I really did think it was Midnight as much as you did!"_

She huffed. "Some _Time Lord_ you are. You just wanted an excuse to kiss me."

He gave an exaggerated shrug, avoiding her gaze. _"Weeell..."_

She rolled her eyes and grinned at him. "Well then, Doctor...I think we have a certain 900-year-old-with-a-failing-memory to save."

_"Hey!"_

--

Mickey gripped the steering-wheel tightly. He knew cruising around town wasn't going to do anything but waste gas and raise neighborhood eyebrows and suspicions...but he couldn't stand sitting there in that tomb-like mansion among sulking faces any longer.

If she got home, they could call him (though they probably wouldn't remember for at least an hour), if she were wandering the streets he might spot her, and if she were holed up somewhere, then he could at least feel like he was doing _something_, rather then twiddling his thumb, arguing whos fault it was, and exchanging false platitudes.

And that was really what it boiled down to. He hadn't felt so useless as he did these past couple of days, since when she had first swanned off. It seemed like he could do nearly anything he wanted if he applied himself--and then he would run across Rose and realize just how little he really could.

And oh how it killed him.

--

_"That's _it_!"_ He announced excitedly, pumping his fist in the air, and snapping his fingers. _"A stream of anti-matter pulsating at that frequency for exactly 2.00057 seconds from this spot right here!"_

He looked immensely pleased with himself when he looked up from his arrayed pages to grin at her. So now all they needed wss an anti-matter-ray. Did Torchwood have one?

"Can the sonic screwdriver do it?" She asked, tilting her head slightly.

_"Naw. It has to be from _this_ side of the field."_ He said, jabbing a finger at one of the read-outs in an attempt to accentuate his point. _"We've still got an hour and a half, you can make it there in time, Rose."_

"But--I don't have any anti-matter phaser things!"

He rolled his eyes. _"An anti-matter _transmitter_ is all you need. And for one of those, if you've got me, all you _really_ need is a handy matter-transmitter."_

She frowned. "There's an experimental one in a nearby lab...but I don't think its functioning."

He gave her a rougish wink. _"Good thing I'm here, ey?"_

"Wouldn't that be...interferin' with natural development or somethin'?"

_"Not if we put it back like we found it, like good kids."_ He smirked. _"Now, come on, lets do this!"_

--

Jackie glanced at the clock on the mantle, and sighed. Jake had passed out an hour back in the recliner, and Mickey still hadn't returned from his patrolling around the city.

She looked up at her husband, who was running a hand along her hair softly, soothingly. "Don't worry, Jacks...I'm sure he's just found Rose and the Doctor, and you know that one...Mickey probably hasn't been able to get a word in edgewise for a half-hour."

"Do you really believe that?" She asked, frowning up at him. "Do you really have that much faith in his abilities?"

"No. I don't know him well enough to tell." He shook his head. "I believe in Rose."

--

She grinned across the car at the Doctor, who was reclining in the passenger seat in a way that would have been entirely unsafe for someone who was physically there, legs crossed, and arms behind his head.

"You're so sure this is gonna work then?" She asked teasingly.

_"Of course I'm sure!"_ He retorted, smirking over at her. _"Am I ever wrong?"_

"Should I show you the list?"

_"You _wrote_ one?"_ He scrunched his nose in disbelief. _"I'm hurt."_

"Oh, come off it." She snorted. "Every time you're wrong is like a moment in history--course I wrote a _list_!"

_"Ah, flattery!"_

"Where are you, anyway?" She asked curiously, as she drummed her fingers on the steering wheel, waiting for a light.

_"Told you. Somewhere along the very edge of the Void. Hard to pinpoint without any sort of existance to tell you where."_

"No, I mean physically...you know...you're running around and all that, so you can't just be in the TARDIS consol room or such."

_"Who says there isn't a special comm room just for this sort of thing?"_ He grinned over at her, then shrugged. _"I guess you could say I'm in a sort of stasis. There're alotta dodgy things going on with the TARDIS at the moment--she seemed to think it was unsafe for me to be up and workin on her."_

She arched an eyebrow. She never could fully comprehend just how sentient the TARDIS was. It certainly didn't seem like computers from TV shows, like Hal...yet there were other times when it seemed downright moody, sometimes he seemed to talk about 'her' like it was wholly sentient and alive, and other times he referred to 'it' like it was just another piece of equipment--very dear, but still.

_"In other words she released some sleepy-sleep-sleep gas in the room I was in and locked the doors."_ He grinned. _"I never really fancied going out in my sleep, so I took a gamble and tried going along the 'line'. Was a bit shaky at first."_

"Ah...so this is like one big dream to you."

_"But a good one, so far."_ He winked at her. _"I can think of a few better ones I've had. though."_

She would have asked what exactly those dreams were, but they had arrived at the part of the rift that the Doctor had calculated would be the best place to use the anti-matter ray gun thing. Which was really some sort of projection device thing that mounted on a tripod. She really needed to come up with a better name for it.

By the time she got out of the car, matter-gun in hand, he had already walked out in front of the car and was staring up into the sky where the rift might be if it were visible. Then again, to him it probably was. She tried not to think too much about the fact that he had walked _through_ the car to do it.

"How come you didn't just fall through the car?"

_"Just a figment of your mind, remember?"_ He said, swirling a finger round next to his head. _"Was easier to ride with, than to run after."_

She shrugged noncommitedly, and wrestledd with setting up the transmatter...meter...mitter...whatever. The Doctor walked a few steps off absently, staring up into the sky and emitting a low whistle.

"Are we running out of time with the rift?"

_"Hm?"_ He looked down from the night toward her, an expression of mild surprise on his face. _"Oh no. I was just thinking...the stars..."_

"They're all funny, I know."

He grinned. _"I was thinking 'uncharted, and just waiting to be explored'."_

She returned his grin. "You're gonna stay on this side, then?"

He arched curious eyebrow. _"You'd prefer I go back?"_

"I dunno...I figured you'd just pop in and out."

The click-whirr-humm of the device said it was finally set up properly, and the Doctor stode over to her side, pointing at a few dials she had rigged up on it (with his careful instructions). "Turn those half way, then press the big button."

"Simple..."

_"I like things simple."_ He grinned.

Returning his smile, she followed his instruction, and a prismatic beam began to pulse into the sky, lighting up the entire rift with a breath-taking similarity to an aurora.

_"We'll want to be getting back to the car and driving _very_ fast now."_

--

He'd been almost ready to give up, when the sky had charged with a glorious plasmoid electricity. At first he was too stunned to form proper thought, but then he remembered something from long ago--almost two years now. A rift along Cardiff, originating from long, long ago. The first Doctor had said it, back when that alien woman had tried to blow up the world.

He wasn't sure how it was there in this universe, or even vaguely what it was doing, but he would bet good money that he knew _who_ was doing it. Although, whether that meant the Doctor really was there, or whether Rose was simply more ingenious than anyone gave her credit for, he didn't know.

In the end, as he slammed his black mini into the next gear, and roared through the empty streets of the city, that didn't really matter. All that really mattered, was that he was going to make a difference again. This time to the one person he'd been trying to make a difference to for far too long.

--

"Okay...so an explosion at the rift is not a bad thing, _how_?"

_"Ahh...its only a tiny little thing."_ He eyed the seatbelt next to him consideringly, ruining the nonchalance he seemed to be going for. _"Its just closing up the wound, is all!"_

"And the raygun thing will survive, right?" She asked, glancing at him.

_"Ah..."_

"Fantastic."

_"Rose..."_ He said cautiously.

"Are you coming through at that spot?"

He shook his head. _"There's a beach near here. Looks alot like that place in Norway, actually."_

She nodded. "I've seen it before."

_"That's where the trajectory will probably end up--juuust outside the rift's edge."_

"So--"

She did not get to finish her question, before the Earth exploded behind her. A scream she was not entirely sure was hers echoed in her ears as her white, Torchwood-issued taxi-interceptor was sent spinning several feet through the air, and crashed violently on its roof.

When the world finally stopped spiralling, she found herself hanging perilously upside down, fiercely sore, woozy, and nose full of the smell of gasoline.

"Small explosion my _foot_, Doctor!" She snapped, glaring at the seat next to her. To her alarm, there was no one there. "Doctor? _Doctor_?!"

--

The teacup in her hands crashed to the floor as she screamed in sudden terror, as the house shook with a powerful exposion. Jake leapt up out of the recliner faster than she previously thought possible, and Pete dashed out of the room.

"What's goin' on?!" Jake asked quickly, expression alert and intense as he looked over at her.

"I...I..." Jackie shook her head. "I don't _know_! It came out of nowhere!"

"My...God..." The voice of Pete filtered through from another room. "The sky...it's...on fire."

--

He was only a few blocks away when it happened, when the entire Cardiff Square erupted into multicolored plasmoid fire. It was strangely silent and peaceful at first, when he put on the brakes and stepped out of the car to get a better look. Then all at once it sort of...swelled outward and collapsed into nothingness with a deafening crash. It was all he could do to dive to the ground before the shockwave sent his car pinwheeling through the sky, and shattering all of the nearby windows.

As silence settled into the city once more--save for the car alarms across the city that had been set off by the explosion or the resulting shockwave--he pulled himself up to a standing position, and felt his mouth fall open as he took in the aftermath.

Nothing flimsier than a street light stood still, the streets were littered with sheets of shattered glass, street-sign either hung in awkward positions, or lay strewn carelessly across the streets or sidewalks. But what most caught his attention was the multi-colored fire blazing along where the rift should be in the sky.

--

Rose winced as she nursed a rather bad cut on her leg, gained from scrambling out of the twisted wreck before it decided to be tempermental and explode in her face or such. Her head throbbed painfully, and she just might have fractured a femur. When she got her hands on the Doctor, she would _throttle_ him. Little explosion indeed!

She hadn't seen a hint of him since the explosion, so she could only assume the TARDIS had woken him when they left the Void--meaning he would be waiting at the beach only a half a mile from where she was walking. And when she got there, she would kill him for making her walk all this way. And for not having nanogenes to fix up something that was absolutely, _entirely_ his fault.

People were starting to fill the streets as they migrated sleepily out to see what on earth had woken them up so rudely. The rather scary looking fire along the rift had reduced to something akin to smoldering, as it repaired itself from her rather rude prodding.

"Never been slapped by someone's mother he said..." She grumbled to herself. "I'll show him slapping...his head's going to be ringing _twice_ as long as mine."

--

Jackie shivered slightly, as her husband hugged her tightly, staring up at the sky. Jake had turned on the telly in a nearby room, and the new anchor was going on about some containment leak at a nuclear facility reacting oddly with the atmosphere, and how 'it was all taken care of, all thats left is to enjoy the light show while it lasts'.

But she knew better...she knew what it sounded like when they covered up for something the Doctor caused, or Torchwood...or Rose. It was no coincidence this happened tonight of all nights.

She shook her head slightly. "Oh, Rose...be safe...be safe...please..."

--

"Doctor!" She sighed, and turned around, scanning another part of the beach. "Doc-_torr_?!"

Where was he? Hadn't he made it through? Where had he gone? Why wasn't he waiting for her? He couldn't not be here...

"You promised me..." She said softly, wandering deeper into the beach, heart sinking with each step. "You said you'd be _here_!"

She did a slow circle in place, scanning everywhere on the tiny little beach--it was barely more than a little cove you could drove a boat-car off into the water with. The colors in the sky were almost gone now, and even from here she could hear the faint sound of emergency workers rushing through the city, assessing damage, searching for the wounded.

Torchwood would not be happy. So where was the Doctor to make it all right?

"_WHERE ARE YOU?!_"

--

Mickey shifted uncomfortably as he tried to get used to the handling of the corvette Pete had let him borrow for the purposes of finding Rose. And oh how they were searching. It had been a day since anyone had seen her, even the spooks at Torchwood were searching for her--though that was less of a mission of kindess, and more of a mission of retribution for taking one of their devices and trying to blow up the city.

He sighed and thumped his head on the steering wheel as he waited at a light. Where could she be hiding? Where would she be? Was she alive? Was she okay? He grimaced at the thought that she might have swanned off with the Doctor without saying one word, and no one would see her in this time period for another year.

He couldn't write it off as that yet, though...not until he had looked everywhere. Where did she like to be that he hadn't checked? Nowhere! No place in the city of Cardiff! She didn't even like Cardiff that much in the other universe...

And then all at once it came to him.

--

Minutes turned to hours, and maybe even days. It didn't really matter to her. She had waited for what seemed like forever, watching the sun slowly color the sky as she sat patiently on a rock, hoping desperately against all reason, all sense, all of reality, that he would pop in any minute and gurgle on about how he'd over shot, and how the TARDIS decided to take him on a trip through Caemelot, and how he was so very, very sorry, and would never ever leave her again.

But he never came.

She wasn't certain when the tears started, when her hope faded to empty and blind despair, when she sunk to the sand, and lost herself in staring at a distant and vague part of the ocean. It didn't really matter. They had gambled everything, they had done it all together against what everyone told them.

And they had lost.

He was gone. He was really...really..._really_ gone.

At some point someone lifted her up, holding her tight, murmuring comforts, saying how thankful they were that she was alive, telling her everything was going to be alright, but she didn't dignify them with any sort of response.

Because they were wrong.

He was gone.

And nothing would ever be alright again.

* * *

AN: NOT The end! If you kill me now, you'll never know how it resolves /dashes away/ 


	8. Requiem

Disclaimer: I've said it seven times now. I don't own DW.

AN/peeks head out from entrenchments/

* * *

_Phantom_

**Chapter 8: _Requiem_**

She closed her eyes a moment, pretending that when she opened her eyes again, he would be there, really there. She pretended when she opened her eyes, he would pull her into a smothering hug like back in the 50s, and tell her everything was okay, that he had found a way after all.

Oh, how she pretended that everything would be okay. Of course, when she opened them again, she was still alone. A cold wind blew across the Norwegian beach, and the Bad Wolf was all alone in a world of her own creation.

And oh how she hated it.

It had been a week since he had gone. Everyone had gathered around her, telling her everything would be okay, faces so understanding, so sympathetic. They had told her she was sick, they had told her they would help, to make the pain go away. They told her a great many things.

But none of them understood. And oh how she hated them for it.

Her head rested against the soft, padded wall behind her. They mostly left her alone for now, with only the odd orderly coming in for her check-ups, telling her she would pull through this one day. Her knees were pulled up to her chest, and she closed her eyes, willing for him to reappear, willing not to be so hopelessly alone anymore.

After all, if he had only been a projection of her imagination, where was he now? If he had only existed to help her through her greatest trauma, why wasn't he helping her now?

Because he really _had_ been there. Torchwood wasn't as infallible as it thought. And he really was dead. Gone. Lost to the Void.

And it was her fault. And...oh..._God_...she _killed_ him!

She gave a broken sob, and buried her face in her knees once again.

The was a soft click of a door, and the gentle padding of slippered feet on the floor. Apparently, her acting out had attracted attention. Oh well..it just meant another hour of memories. Another hour with _him_.

"Rose..." They never used her first name...and...and the voice was so impossibly familiar...and...

And he was dead, so he really was just her imagination.

She shook her head violently, fighting another wave of tears. "You're not real..."

There was an unintelligible sound, and strong arms wrapped around her form, sweeping her off of her feet. "Rose...please..."

She swallowed softly, and looked up at his blurry form through tears. He looked so sad, it only made her want to cry more. "Can hallucinations pick me up?"

He chuckled softly. "No...well...there is on this one little moon--"

Her heart lurched in her chest in an entirely more pleasant way than the week before, and she flung her arms around his neck, sobbing into his shoulder. "I thought you were _dead_! I thought...I...I..."

The arms around her tightened, and the voice that spoke sounded strained. "Rose...I'm so sorry...I don't know how, but the instability of the rift ended up shooting me out a week late in Okinawa."

"Why didn't you just go back?"

"You know I can't, Rose. Not once I'm already there." He said softly.

She nodded softly, not looking up at him. "Bastard."

He made an amused sound. "Lets get you out of here. Never liked clinics like these, anyway."

She looked up at him, then. "Where?"

He smiled. "Home."

--

He frowned slightly as he walked down the sidewalk, bag of lunch in hand. They'd had no choice after Torchwood caught up. It was either Cardiff's Clinic for the Chronically Grieving, or one of those cells Rose used to shiver while talking about, that Torchwood kept the ones they were not-so-happy with.,

Not even Pete's money would have been able to protect her then. Besides...maybe this would help her after all. Maybe she could finally move on with their help, be the Rose he used to know--or at least the Rose he knew in the battle of Canary Wharf.

The sound of familiar laughter drifted through the air, and caused Mickey to look up with a start. No one seemed to be laughing that was passing by...but there was the sound again. A laugh that was distinctly Rose-like, drifting from a nearby alleyway.

Without thinking, he raced forward into it, even though it simply couldn't be _possible_. And skidded abruptly to a halt when he saw the old impossibly familiar box. And Rose. And the Doctor. Standing in front of it, and laughing about something.

"Rose...?"

She turned in surprise. "Mickey!"

He walked up closer, pointing in between her and the man who couldn't have been there. "He...you...The..."

Her eyes widened suddenly. "You mean you can see him?!"

"_Of course I--_"

He was cut off as she suddenly lunged forward to place a firm kiss on his lips. He was half-tempted to turn around and back again to see if she would repeat herself.

"So...you believe me now?" The Doctor was grinning like the cat who'd caught the mouse. Or was it the mouse who'd caught the cheese? Didn't matter.

"So...that's it then..." He sighed, not as disappointed as he made himself look. After all...she would be happy now. And happy was something she had never truly been for all of a year. "You're just going swanning off again without a word?"

"You can come if you like." The Doctor offered, like he had once long ago. "There's a whole universe just _waiting_ to be explored! And its a universe I haven't seen yet--not this one."

He chuckled, and shook his head. He'd tried that path before, and it had lead him here. This time he would stay where he was needed. "Think I'll stay here this time."

Rose frowned. "You'll tell Mum, won't you?"

He nodded. Once he found a big enough sheild to hide behind, anyway.

--

She couldn't stop grinning. How could she? She thought she'd lost everything, and now she had it all back with more to spare. How could she be any happier than now, as he smiled down at her, eyes shining with warmth and love--and really, physically there?

"Well..guess I'll be going then." He shrugged.

She frowned at his wording. "Wait...on your own?"

"I was hoping _you'd_ wanna go..." His smile faded, and an unspoken question was written clearly in his dark eyes.

She took the hand that hung at his waist in both of hers, and grinned up at him. "I was hoping that, too."

His grin returned full force then. "Fantastic."

"But..." She said quickly, as he turned to open the TARDIS doors. "There's something I wanna do first."

He turned around curiously. "What?"

One of her hands released his and grabbed ahold of his collar. "This."

And that was when she pulled him down for a kiss she should have given him years ago. A wonderful, beautiful kiss she wouldn't have traded for a thousand universes to explore.

* * *

AN: Wheee. See? I'm not entirely evil, am I? Huh? Huh? 1 lil epilogue to go. 


	9. Epilogue

Disclaimer: If I owned DW, they'd be smart enough to think up ways around any predicaments between D/R

AN: And blast the fanfare! The Epilogue is finally here!

* * *

_Phantom_

**_Epilogue_**

_My name is Rose Tyler. For 19 years of my life, I barely even lived. For two years I lived more than I thought was possible, and then I died. One year later he found me again. And this time I'm never going to let go._

It had never felt so truly like coming home as it had when she'd stepped across the threshold of the TARDIS once again. She had never felt so alive as when she held his hand as the TARDIS set off into a brand new Vortex. She had never been so happy as when he had vowed to find a way to keep her with him for as long as they both were together, no matter what.

It seemed so long ago when she was just another face working in a small little office building, trying to dredge up a whit of life worth living, but it had only really been a few months. Perhaps it had just been all she had explored and discovered in the small amount of time.

Last time they had set out, he had been the master, showing her all there was to see, and grinning in fatherly pride as she made her stumbling steps through the universe, always catching her when she fell. This time they plunged into the unknown together, never letting go of the other's hand.

Just a few weeks back, the Doctor had shown her for _just_ how extended a time he could do one thing. She grinned at that particular memory, and across the consol, the Doctor grinned back at her.

She sighed softly as he smiled at her. Her life began and ended with that smile, her love, her loss, her tears and her joy. Her very soul seemed to be wrapped up and drawn in by that smile. And judging by the wink he gave her before he looked back at the consol, he was quite aware of it.

"Doctor?"

He looked up. "Rose?"

"How long're ya gonna stay with me?"

He grinned then, and she knew he would keep his answer if it meant tearing apart the fabric of time and space and whatever else tried to stand in their way. "Forever."

**The End**

* * *

AN: And that's all she wrote. Although...I might consider a spinoff/sequel thing if people're interested enough :P 


End file.
